Currently my immediate family, my parents and my brother, are sitting in traffic around Monmouth on their way to spend the weekend waking up my currently semi dormant garden. Three full size adults take up an extraordinary amount of space it seems in what is otherwise a rather small two up two down red brick terraced house. The interaction of three groups who otherwise live alone: me, my brother and my parents is curiously accommodating. The eagerness to be the perfect host occasionally leads to light friction when rubbing up against the eagerness to help! No doubt the garden will be inspected after dark by yours truly; perhaps I shall disturb hedgehogs snuffling in the leaf mould except of course by tomorrow evening the flower beds will be yawning in their emptiness as all on site rubbish will have been removed.
Last night I sent a text to my brother asking him to bring his sleeping bag largely for my convenience as the amount of laundry created by 3 additional persons sleeping and washing is frankly disproportionate! I checked this tactic out with the swimming ladies who thought this was entirely acceptable thereby freeing me from any latent guilt that might have been lingering. As it happens it was a good job I did as somehow I am unable to locate the spare duvets; heaven only knows what I’ve done with them in my spring cleaning frenzy! I suspect the animal shelter may have been the beneficiaries as to pass the items on to another human would be unacceptable when the owner has been experiencing the delights of the night sweat! Quite how I don’t (a) dissolve or (b) experience severe dehydration is a mystery to me; the menopause is like some form of broiling except the skin doesn’t wrinkle which is odd.
And now the darling are arriving rather earlier than anticipated I wonder whether they will require feeding as this extra meal has not be catered for. Cheese, crackers and pork pies perhaps i.e. the gubbins purchased for lunch tomorrow rounded off with stewed rhubarb and a mullerlite yogurt. I hope the substitution of Laughing Cow Cheese spread for margarine is acceptable as that is the one item that didn’t make it into the trolley today. But hey dad will be overjoyed with the Chocolate Coconut Macaroons which he will attempt to eat in multiples of twoi without my mother noticing and saying ‘Oh Ken!’ followed by ‘Frances don’t encourage him!’
I wish you all a pleasant weekend as I attempt to garden, accommodate the compulsory trip to M&S Culverhouse Cross, feed gannets and smile smile smile through the new drugs (of which more later as I’ve had an inappropriate giggle over the side effects – I could loose weight and experience feeling of ecstasy coupled with bouts of depression and nausea I simply can’t wait!)