Toothless Wonder or Pained Expression? Sucking White Maltesers

I’m sure we are all familiar with the expression ‘age doesn’t come alone’ usually uttered with a resigned sigh. One of the delightful and curious consequences of my (MS) diagnosis, or as I occasionally say ‘my special powers’, is my body is aging at an alarming rate. I find myself in a state of advanced aging enabling me to relate to friends a decade or so older than me. Not quite to my parents generation both of whom are rather faster than me on numerous fronts – sometimes it’s like being out with a pair of Duracell bunnies!

On more than one occasion my mother has suddenly stopped when she realises I’m not engaging in the conversation because she is so far ahead of me I can no longer hear what she is saying! We strike quite a dash as we walk down the main street of Chesterfield: her 5 foot 3 and very speedy, me 5 foot 11 (well 10 ½ to be precise but with heels nearer to 6 foot) – gliding in slow motion as I do my model walking on crutches! I am wont to smirk and giggle to myself as she practically disappears into the horizon which can make people throw slightly worried glances in my direction – as a country we tend to be wary of people who talk to themselves.

What makes me ponder the question of aging today is a visit to the dentist. Over the last few years my once robust dentition has gradually been eroded at least in part as a side effect of medication. As I was paying the receptionist today after 2 fillings (£80) she handed me 2 sheets of A4 paper entitled ‘Dental Plan #1’. This dental practice usually gives the patient the dental plan after the work has been carried out which always seemed a tad pointless to me. Today I do read the plan as it is 2 sides long and lists all the fillings and procedures I need; 16 fillings (£40/each), a scale and polish (£35), a clinical examination (£25) and 2 small films (a bargain at £5 each)!

The receptionist helpfully suggests I might want to have one a month to spread the cost (and the discomfort)! The idea of making a monthly date to see the dentist for nigh on 18 months does not make my heart flutter somehow! The dentist has already offered to refer me to the Dental Hospital to see if they might be able to arrest this frankly alarming pace of decay. Having had my comprehensive 7 minute annual review with the Neurologist yesterday the idea of having to familiarise myself with yet another NHS institution does not appeal!

As I write I still can’t feel half my face including lips and tongue which is disconcerting when attempting to multi task with my mouth; ladies please its 1233 and I am alone! I refer to you to my signature image above plus a cafetiere of coffee and a bowl of white Maltesers (that I am reduced to sucking). What should I do is the question? I have a dilemma or should I say a ‘choice’. The options being carry on taking the drugs as my gnashers fall out one by one rendering me a less than attractive toothless (but relatively pain free) wonder which given the less than perfect starting point isn’t that appealing! Or embrace the pain, reduce the drugs and sport a perpetually pained expression; a version of the botox paralysis without the costly procedure. Oh what a quandary I find myself in.

In the scheme of things I sense I could lose hours today pondering this question so I will resist browsing the websites of cosmetic dental practices although I confess to being fascinated by brilliant white perfect teeth. I heard a portrait artist saying teeth were one of the most difficult things to get right and he preferred the sitter to remain tight lipped (for convenience)!

 

 

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2 Comments

Filed under Musings of a Contemporary Spinster

2 responses to “Toothless Wonder or Pained Expression? Sucking White Maltesers

  1. I can sympathise as after my serious illness a few years ago I lost a bridge that had served me very well.I feel that this was due in part to the medication I was forced to indgest.

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