Christmas is a curious time in many ways. Why are so many of us driven to spend money on presents for people we are only slightly acquainted with? It seldom ends well with guilt (often) on both sides, the recipient and the giver. It horrifies me that I too may be guilty of such behaviour but it’s bound to happen; thankfully most of the time one is blissfully unaware. But I confess to utter bemusement at some items I’ve seen exchanged including occasionally ones I too have received.
This bracelet threw me completely; the butterfly is virtually the width of one’s wrist and was purchased in the gift shop found in the public area of a well known Cardiff hospital. A place where patients and visitors mill around seeking comfort and solace to make us feel better even momentarily. The vulnerability of the buyer is perhaps exploited? The bracelet, neatly boxed, was presented in a fancy gift bag accompanied with the words ‘if you don’t like it don’t worry we can change it for something else’. Don’t you wonder whether someone actually means it? On this occasion the question was repeated when I encountered the giver again; I am a rubbish liar so I confessed all! But I need not have worried, the son of the giver plans to present it to his girlfriend when he gets back from his holiday. Perfect for pacifying a slighted lady apparently!
Now I am a convert to the washer-drier; the clothes are softer than being drier on a rack in front of the radiator. I haven’t had the electricity bill since the new appliance arrived but now I’ve got balls apparently both the bills and the lint will be noticeably reduced. Auntie is an advocate of these additions to the drier; the recommendation came from the Washing Machine engineer himself! Wow I wonder how he knows? Save me from a man who sits riveted to the electricity meter which the drier chunders away to itself!
And finally I do love a scented candle for more reasons than the Spinster is a committed smoker and I’d hate to think that my bijoux little house clung desperately to the odour carefully created courtesy of More International (Menthol variety (green which surely means it can be counted as one of one’s five a day?)). Back to scent soaked wax I prefer a vanilla, honey & chocolate or some smell along those lines as opposed to the synthetic floral variety which never quite hits the (nasal) spot for me. I confess that I was pulled up short when initially dismissing a recent gift entitled Night Time; first sniff had me wrinkling my already snub nose in not exactly disgust but something not far off! In a moment of lazy weakness I lit it in the bedroom on account of it being the only one available upstairs and I was pleasantly surprised as it was actually quite pleasing as it wafted quite soothing odours across the room!
But I was a little flummoxed to receive an amber scented candle; amber is a resin and surely it has no scent? To check I sniffed my amber earrings and can report a thankfully odourless accessory. Should I return them to John Lewis along with the candle purchased from the same emporium? Never knowingly undersold? How about under scented? Given the experience with Night Time perhaps I should give it a chance – the description and origins are impressive n’est pas?
As I contemplate the scent of amber I gaze idly out of the front window; my signature pose adopted i.e. typing with a Fentanyl ‘lolly’ and a cigarette both in my mouth; at the same time. A woman equally idly looks into my front window; our eyes meet momentarily until she quickly turns her head. Looking down at the frozen snow she realises she can’t walk quickly out of view and can’t resist looking in the window again. At least this time the onlooker is the embarrassed one; on a previous occasion the Spinster was caught licking ‘the lid of life’ i.e. a Mullerlite Yogurt lid!
Unusually for a Sunday I had a meeting on the premises, in the dining room that I laughingly refer to as the meeting room when hosting small away days for clients. Towards the end one of the ladies present suddenly moved her hands into view from her lap where they had previously been residing. The movement caught my eye and when I turned towards her I saw two brown balls. Or so it seemed at first half glance. It was one of those occasions when there is simply no option other than to have a good stare for verification purposes. At this point I realised the balls were pompoms attached to the scarf she had loosely draped around her neck (and now it occurs to me I should have asked if she was cold)! Smiling of course I had to explain what had caused such mirth amid an otherwise depressing conversation.
Women with balls was we concluded quite apt an approach to adopt when we three will meet again in the company of potentially hostile ‘companions’. Otherwise known as new colleagues thrown together in a forced marriage following a legal joining together designed to ultimately be a mutually beneficial arrangement. The jury remains out on this one.
Arriving home last night around 10pm after seeing another excellent performance at Chapter of ‘Sometimes We Look’ created by the multitalented Marega Palser I was somewhat less than ecstatic to find another vehicle in my disabled space! Fortunately there was a space on the opposite side of the road; a distance easily dismissed by the ordinary human being perfectly ambulant. Por moi d’accord the prospect of mincing my way across the melted snow cum slush cum ice was a tad terrifying especially as I had a carrier bag containing supplies for the meeting (chocolate and sugar rich treats are always a good idea in times of potential stress as Bridget Jones observed). Now rubber ferrules are lethal on ice as I have mentioned so many times previously that even I am bored of noting the hazard!
Wishing I had the balance of an Emperor Penguin I prepared to embark on the voyage (across the road to my front door). Deep breath ladies, focus, concentrate grit yer teeth and momentarily stop attempting to spit feathers (in honour of the insensitive git who has abandoned their vehicle in the space you waited patiently for 3.5 years for). Baby steps tend to make the body tense unhelpfully as don’t they always advise one to relax into a fall? Not that I plan to fall but given my superb record at tumbling over the rug downstairs it’s best to be prepared!
Arriving at the destination, well the pavement on the other side, I stand and give the cuckoo car a menacing stare (several times). There is no blue badge on the dashboard but being charitable the white box painted on the road is obscured by snow. This would have been ‘acceptable’ had the owner of the cuckoo car been a stranger; next morning I found out the car belonged to a neighbour, a close neighbour who I speak to pretty much every day. Gobsmacked my carefully worded note crafted to politely point out the error of their ways seemed irrelevant; seething I leave it too long, so long that I see the guilty party drive away. I wonder if she will look me in the eye next time she sees me…
Post Script: One seldom reads the bottom of things but the curious symbols on the bottom of the aforementioned candle caught my eye; what is the smiling female warning me of? And is that a rabbit or a long eared dog by her side?